While most of the world rested contently like fools, confident a meteorite that recently crashed in Russia was in fact a meteorite, regular Russians - "Andrei Vodka Handles"? - were busy chewing through the lies and getting down to the real meaty truth. About half of Russian citizens believe the meteor was actually a UFO, God, or a government conspiracy, according to a poll conducted by a popular Russian newspaper.
The Russian newspaper offers its own theories about why the country's people are certain they aren't being told the whole story: "Our people remember the Soviet past, when news of disasters was concealed or lied about," said Alexei Grazhdankin, deputy director of the Levada Center, an independent Moscow polling agency.
"We have no scientific polls on what people think about the Chelyabinsk event last week, but it's safe to assume the majority of Russians accept that it was a meteorite. However, our past surveys show that up to 25 percent of Russians do believe in UFOs. A lot of our people just prefer not to accept the safe explanations they were taught at school. Even when all necessary information is available, they don't want to believe it."
It's understandable some Russians are still seeking out answers following what most certainly wasn't the collision of a 10-ton meteorite. If that thing really was a meteorite, it was the largest to smash into the Earth since the infamous 1908 "Tunguskaya event" that leveled an 800-square-mile area in rural Sibera.
Some skeptics believe the explosion was caused by a meteorite, but believe the meteor came into contact with a UFO before it hit the ground.
"In Chelyabinsk last week we had a mini-Tungus," scientist Yury Lavbin said, the Monitor reported. "In both cases there were two objects, and a UFO knocked down the second object. In the Tungus case, the UFO was itself destroyed. We know this because we've been to Tungus and recovered metallic fragments that are impossible to produce on Earth ... If not for the intervention of the UFO in the Tungus event, the Earth could have been plunged into a second stone age. I think we were saved again last week," he said.
The shock wave from the Chelyabinsk meteorite injured more than 1,200 people as the object fragmented above the city of Chelyabinsk in the Ural Mountains, the Washington Post reported.
The shock wave resulting from the meteorite crash - the size of 30 Hiroshima A-bombs - shattered windows and imploded roofs throughout the region, sending 34 adults and 12 children to the hospital for treatment, with two in intensive care, Russia's Ministry of Emergencies said, according to Sky News. No one was killed in the blast, and none of the injuries sustained were considered critical, as the majority were cuts from broken glass or concussions, according to the Post.
In Chelyabinsk "more than 297 [apartment] houses, 12 schools, several social-service facilities and a number of industrial enterprises were damaged," said President Vladimir Putin in a statement.
The meteorite burst into "several dozen large pieces" as it shot across the sky, said emergency situations minister Vladimir Puchkov, the Post reported.